Chow Mein (J. Arthur Mein) is a Chinese entrepreneur with a number of businesses and enterprises around England. Although he thinks he has a mastery of the English language, his Chinese accent tends to warp certain words into other words ("America" into "A miracle"), This tends to result in a lot of frustration in Mein as he has a hard time understanding the confusion. He is sometimes antagonised himself by the Hindu accent of Mamood Ramsun. Mein is also married; his wife is also frustrated by the English/Chinese language barrier.



  • Chow Mein was played by Benny Hill. His wife was played by actress Zienia Merton.
  • In an early episode, he says his first name in "Cookie."



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