Chow Mein (J. Arthur Mein) is a Chinese entrepreneur with a number of businesses and enterprises around England. Although he thinks he has a mastery of the English language, his Chinese accent tends to warp certain words into other words ("America" into "A miracle"), This tends to result in a lot of frustration in Mein as he has a hard time understanding the confusion. He is sometimes antagonised himself by the Hindu accent of Mamood Ramsun. Mein is also married; his wife is also frustrated by the English/Chinese language barrier.
- Film producer in Great Mysteries with Orson Buggy
- Chinese Overseas Minister in Jackie Wright: Holiday
- Chinese Restaurant in Cinema: The Vintage Years
- Cow breeder in Benny's All-Star Finale
- Guest on "Meeting People" with Nicholas Parsons in Down Memory Lane
- Owner of Chinese circus in A Packed Program
- Hotel Splendid waiter in The Monte Carbolic Show
- Ventriloquist in Benny Hill's World Tour: New York
- Chow Mein was played by Benny Hill. His wife was played by actress Zienia Merton.
- In an early episode, he says his first name in "Cookie."
- Down Memory Lane
- Cinema: The Vintage Years
- Great Mysteries with Orson Buggy
- Jackie Wright: Holiday
- Benny's All-Star Finale
- A Packed Program
- The Monte Carbolic Show