Celebrity menu


Celebrity Menu was a comedy monologue by Benny Hill performed within a restaurant sketch on January 13, 1988 with reactions and responses from his patrons. The pretense of the monologue was a menu of dishes and drinks based on the careers of celebrities from England and the United States. Henry McGee, Anna Dawson, Sharon Kiel(?) and Jon Jon Keefe play guests in his fine restaurant.



  • Edwina Currie with Anika Rice
  • Pile of Fitzgerald
  • Magnus Pike (fish)
  • Orville & Dean (skate)
  • Samantha Fox (tender young game bird with no dressing)
  • Cynthia Payne (Brussel sprouts)
  • Jimmy Tarbuck
  • Russell Harty
  • Charles and Diana Salad (lettuce alone)
  • Oliver Reed (thick slice of ham in brandy)
  • Superman (ham with capon)
  • Anne Diamond (sheeps head with brains taken out)
  • Clive James (load of sweet bread)
  • Frank Bruno (black pudding with mussels)
  • Cyril Smith (whale meat)
  • Little & Large (shrimp and whale meat)
  • Vera Lynn (whale meat again)
  • Nina Myskow (jawbone of an ass with a double helping of tongue and a lot on top)
  • Joan Bakewell (little tart)
  • Semolina Scott
  • Dolly Parton (little beef with large pear)
  • Lena Zavaroni (macaroni)
  • John McEnroe
  • Larry Grayson (puff pastry)
  • Tia Maria Whittaker (drink in a D-cup)
  • Alec Guinness (drink)
  • Mr. T (drink)