Bio[]
Benny The Bum (aka "The Vagabond") is a semi-recurring vagrant who wanders around Little Dimpton. Not much is known about him or where he comes from, but he is well known by his mustache and shabby clothes which he treats as if it was a fine suit with a crease in it.
On April 25, 1984, he is seen wandering through a residential district and spying on a couple (Ken Sedd and Abigail Higgins) kissing when he sees a lost wallet, but the couple's German Shepard won't let him near it. He has to wind the dog on its chain around ots dog house to get to it, but it turns out the wallet only has shreds of paper in it.
Benny seems to hang out in an alleyway in town, later getting chased out by a police officer (Henry McGee) who frisks him and the ugly homeless lady (Bob Todd). The old lady afterward chasing after the cop. At night, Benny lines his clothing with newspapers to keep warm, placing "The Guardian" in his shirt, "The Sun" with Page Three down the front of his pants and "The Radio Times" down the back of his pants. He washes up in a bird bath in which he leaves his false teeth before leaving a wake-up call through a phone booth.
The next morning, he repairs a hole in the sole of his shoe by ripping a section off a "Wet Paint" sign to cover the hole, but a young lady (Lisa Jackman?) misses the sign and sits on the wet bench. Benny helps her out by painting the rest of her dress, but he himself ends up sitting on the wet bench.
Benny eventually makes his way to the St. Phillips Doss House where he quarrels with the matron (Karan David?) over his efforts to keep his hat. After going in and out of the line several times with several others (Henry McGee, Jon Jon Keefe and Ken Sedd), he manages to hold on to it. The place is cold, drafty and leaky; one guest (Bob Todd) drinks the rain coming through the roof into a bucket. As Benny goes to bed, he notices his elderly bunk mate (Jackie Wright) from the bunk over him drinking several mugs of beer and feels compelled to sleep with a bucket to protect himself.
On the way out, Benny wanders by the Hospital for Contagious Disease and lingers too long, picking up a strange malady that leaves him covered in spots. He infects a dog, an ad for Bennyderm skin cleaner and four by-standers at a bus stop (Karan David, Bob Todd, Jackie Wright and Jenny Westbrook). At the park, he crosses two ladies (Lesley Woods and Noreen Bothen?) playing Frisbee, but when it flies away, he offers to get it for them. It lands near a picnic where its mistaken as a plate and gets pie on it which when thrown back ends up splattering one of the girls in the face. One of the picnickers (Abigail Higgins) stands to protest, but upon seeing his spotted face, they all flee from the site, leaving their meal for Benny to happily appreciate in peace.
On April 16, 1986, Benny re-visits Little Dimpton and knocks over a statue at the park, breaking it into several pieces as a result. He struggles to put it back together several times until a young lady (Lorraine Doyle) becomes the model inspiring him to fix it. Even then, the connections are so worn down from repeated attempts to assemble it that it still falls apart.
Trivia[]
- Benny the Bum was played by Benny Hill.
- Karan David possibly plays the tricycle rider and the beer drinker in the alley swatting the mannequin.
- The other picnickers with Abigail are Jon Jon Keefe, Louise English, Ken Sedd, Tracy Smith and Jackie Wright.
- The 1984 sketch was accompanied by Louise English and Erica Lynley singing "The Vagabond" with Lesley Woods on flute and surrounded by Lindsay Neil, Tracy Smith, Noreen Bothan, Fiona Sloman and Abigail Higgins, but at the end, they are replaced by Bob Todd, Len Keyes, Jon Jon Keefe, Henry McGee and Benny still with his spots.
